How Military Courts Fail America
I'm not gone, I'm just getting married.
After months of chronic liver and kidney failure, getting engaged to a giant Cossack, and adopting a kitten (Gracie Bigglesworth-Johnson), I finally decided to step back into my apparently appropriate realm of political theory. I am happy to report that during my absence I have received over 100 academic mentions despite not having completed a single year of college education. It’s little things like that which keep you burning.
Which brings me back, naturally, to the 1890s.
Not the fashion. Not the art. But the naval courts-martial.
There is something wonderfully bleak about the bureaucratic poetry of a military court transcript. Each line, when trimmed of fat, contains a hidden humor which I would like to elucidate for our communal enjoyment as well as to warn the world, as much as a soon-to-be housewife can, to the serious misguidance the United States military can offer. If the right person reads it, it might save some lives.
Let’s walk through it together.
As we walk, I encourage you to remember that just because the minutes of a court may be neat, and the chairs may be filled with all rules followed, there is no reason on that account to believe that any justice is being “served”. Let’s take, as our first case, the destruction of the USS Maine in Havana Harbor — February 15, 1898 — a slow night in a sleepy harbor, punctuated by the death rattle of an empire just beginning to find its voice.
"The court met pursuant to the adjournment of yesterday."
"The court was then cleared for deliberation."“ In the opinion of the court the Maine was destroyed by the explosion of a submarine mine, which caused the partial explosion of two or more of the forward magazines.”
“The court has been unable to obtain evidence fixing the responsibility for the destruction of the Maine upon any person or persons.”
“The court met pursuant to the adjournment of yesterday.” Yes, and next week they will meet again and will continue to do so until nothing remains except the ritual itself. They have done this for over one hundred years and who can say that more often than not that justice has been served?
“…cleared for deliberation.” Cleared for an unacceptable amount of tax dollars and time to be wasted on brunches and dinner parties for tyrants in Washington. It was unacceptable then, and it is unacceptable now — we will get to the ‘now’ part here in a minute. The Maine was destroyed, but the claim that its destruction must have been due to a mine was made without evidence. No enemy was identified and no explanation was offered as to why anyone would mine a U.S. ship in a neutral harbor. But from the moment they wrote those words — “submarine mine” — the machinery began to turn.
The longer you stare at this process, the clearer it becomes: these are rites, not reports. The U.S. military does not answer questions — it recites. It performs. The stage has changed, but the play remains the same. I ask you consider the current US administration no different than its predecessors, and that you discourage your sons and daughters from an untimely death because, really, that’s what’s on the line.
- written by M. Shultz — soon to be M. Saba